How to Annoy and Atheist:

7) Tell them that the universe is too complex to "just exist," and must have been created by a God who "just exists."

8) Make up statistics.

12) Use multiple versions of Pascal's Wager as though you thought them up yourself.

13) Use the Second Law of Thermodynamics to disprove evolution.

23) Use bad math to back up your claims.

31) Lead off your criticism of the Big Bang theory with the disclaimer that you're not a physicist like he is.

32) Lead off your suggestions for ways to prove that Noah's Flood occured with the disclaimer that you're not a geologist like he is.

33) Overwhelm him with your knowledge of science, using examples: "And because of entropy you have to press the nozzle on the spray can. The nozzle is entropy."

34) Use Latin a lot.

39) Blame absolutely everything wrong in society on evolution.

63) Ask him how he knows God isn't real if he can't see the air.

74) Attribute every apparent error in the Bible to mistranslation.

77) When shown that the Bible says that Pi=3, say that the Hebrews didn't know anything about science, so it's not their fault.

78) When shown the creation account in Genesis, insist that the Hebrews had all kinds of scientific savvy, being inspired by God.

90) Claim that archeology is proof of the Bible's truth.

121) Claim that Darwin recanted evolution on his deathbed.

124) Say that evolution is not proven -- therefore the Bible is correct.

146) Spell it "evilution."

188) When asked what's wrong with evolution, tell them that it doesn't account for the origin of matter.

237) Create hoaxes to prove creationism (i.e. a human footprint alongside a dino's footprint).

244) Grossly misunderstand the word "theory."

279) Point to something in nature that's really cool, and call it proof of God's existence.

Tags: Humor